Attachment-Focused Therapy for Adults
Therapy for the anxious, avoidant, and everyone in between.
We cannot overstate the effect of our relationships with our childhood caretakers on who we become as adults.
Do you ever feel like you're constantly searching for connection, but never quite finding it? Or maybe you feel like you're constantly seeking validation but never feel truly seen. These could be signs of an insecure attachment style, rooted in early childhood experiences.
Attachment styles are the patterns we develop in our relationships, based on how our needs were met (or not met) as infants and toddlers. This could mean anything from neglect or abuse to a parent who was often unavailable or unpredictable. These patterns can persist into adulthood, impacting our romantic relationships, friendships, and even our relationship with ourselves.
Coping may have helped in the past – but now? Not so much.
You feel uncomfortable getting close to others, or you push them away right when things get serious.
You prioritize others over yourself because you’re afraid of being left or rejected, even in stable relationships.
You have one heck of an inner critic, and you feel driven by shame.
Your emotions scare you, and they feel completely out of your control. You might even want to get rid of them.
You have no idea what it means to validate yourself, so you usually look for approval from others – but it never feels like enough.
Other people seem to be able to deal with stress, but it completely knocks you out.
CLOSENESS IS WITHIN REACH
Become your own inner loving parent and feel secure inside – outside validation not needed.
Your early childhood experiences are like the foundation of the house that is you – your sense of self, how you relate to others, and how you feel about yourself. If the foundation is shaky, then life’s stiff breezes – everyday stressors, a fight or breakup, or feeling misunderstood – can blow the whole house down. It’s exhausting.
We’re here to help you rebuild the foundation, so you can feel safe, secure, and resilient. It starts with the relationship with your therapist, who can help you explore these hurts with deep compassion and respect for your experience. Parts Work Therapy and somatic modalities can help you attune to and care for the young, hurt parts of yourself who are still waiting to get what they never got – compassion, patience, play, and understanding.
The goal: A secure base inside yourself to turn to whenever you or your young parts need support, translating to a stronger sense of self, emotional resilience, and feeling like the strong, confident adult you are. It’s an astonishingly beautiful process, and you deserve it.
IMAGINE IF YOU COULD
Really, Truly, Actually Connect
We'll start with helping you connect to yourself and your body with compassion. This will help you build secure bonds with others, with the safety and closeness you’ve been seeking.
Trust Yourself and Others
If you’re feeling ready to reclaim your inner compass and develop healthy boundaries, we can help you learn to trust your intuition and build authentic connections.
Manage Emotions Without Fearing Them
Navigate your emotional landscape with understanding and self-compassion. We’ll hold space for fear and shame, so you can ultimately move away from them and towards the full spectrum of your feelings.
Communicate Effectively and Set Boundaries
Expressing your needs and desires with clarity is a skill many of us never learned. We can help you to establish healthy boundaries for empowered and fulfilling relationships.
WE WANT YOU TO KNOW
You’re worthy of love and connection.
You always have been.
If you're looking for a therapist for attachment issues, you've come to the right place. It’s time to feel good about who you are.
faqs
Common questions about Attachment-Focused Therapy
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Attachment trauma is based on the understanding that our early experiences with caregivers shape our ability to form healthy relationships as adults. If those early experiences were disrupted by neglect, abuse, or even just inconsistency, it can create a form of trauma called "attachment trauma."
Think of it this way: your early attachments are like the emotional foundation of the house that is your self-concept and life. If that foundation is shaky, it makes everything built on top of it unreliable and prone to collapse, even in a light breeze. Attachment-focused therapy can help you repair the foundation. Schedule a consultation here.
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Attachment-focused therapy is a type of psychotherapy that delves into the core of how we connect with others. We’ll work to help you build a stronger, more secure foundation for connection by building safety with a therapist who regards you with unconditional compassion and who can help you connect with, and care for, the young, hurt parts of yourself. We may use parts work (IFS), somatic therapy, or other compassion-focused tools. It’s honestly a beautiful process, and we love helping people with it. Schedule a consultation here.
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That may be part of our work together! The truth is that our attachment styles may vary based on who we’re interacting with, though we all tend to lean towards one pattern or another. For example, you may be avoidant with your friends (stepping away when things feel too close), but maybe you err anxious in romantic relationships (fearing abandonment or loss, even when there’s security).
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Therapy is not about blaming parents, but it is about providing context. Most of the time, parents do the best they can with what they have. Sometimes that “best” is not very good, and it’s important to know that as context for what you’re experiencing. We also know that intergenerational trauma, racism, poverty, and other systems of oppression may have an impact on a parents’ ability to show up for you. Nonetheless, the impact on you was real. You deserve to have feelings about it, and you also deserve to feel better. We’d love to help.
Schedule a consultation here.
READY TO GET STARTED?